Questions

I am a perfectionist.  I don't do anything half-heartedly.  I learn absolutely everything I can about a topic before I get involved.  I have learned well how to research, but haven't master the art of conclusion just yet.

Fourteen months ago, I found out I would soon become a mother.  Six months ago I welcomed my beautiful daughter into the world.  You had better believe I spent my pregnancy reading every parenting book I could find.  And then SJ was born, and I learned that a book doesn't always provide the answers life requires.  {I realize the irony in that statement.  The Book does provide the answers life requires.}

I also learned that everyone has opinions about the right way to raise a child.  There are countless philosophies based on an equal number of theories and studies about the effects of this style or that style of parenting.  With so many ideas out there, how in the world can I figure out how to raise my baby?

A baby is a helpless little human.  She lacks the physical and physiological skills to take care of herself.  She cannot express her needs in any way except through her cry.  As a newborn, she has no wants, only needs.  I have read that it is impossible to spoil a baby.  They say you cannot hold her too much, respond to her cries too quickly.  She will always tell you when she has needs that must be met. 

A baby is a human.  Eventually she does need to be taught how to behave.  She does need to be taught how to live.  At what point in her development do needs become wants, and must behavior be taught?  You may not be able to spoil a baby, but you certainly can spoil a child.  When does a baby become a child?  Where is the line?  When should things switch from being baby-led to being parent-led?

And what if I do it wrong?  There are so many different ideas, and so many of them are in stark opposition with one another.  How can I be sure I'm doing the right thing?  And more importantly, how can I teach her to make right choices, and to love God?  How do I know she'll turn out okay?

Two Weeks!

We will be moving to our new apartment in two weeks and I can't wait!  It still seems so far away, until I look around at everything I have to do before then.  Then I realize that I have way too much to do and not nearly enough time to get it done.  I would probably be more productive if M were here to help, but his ship had to go back out for another underway.  He will be home in time to help us move (we hope!), but all the packing is up to me.  My MIL is coming to visit and help me pack next week, and I am so grateful and looking forward to the help.  I had hoped to be able to get a good bit of the work done before she comes, but I doubt that will happen.  I had plans of having things organized and packed neatly so unpacking would be a breeze.  So far that is not transpiring: SJ has been quite a handful this underway.  I'm not sure if it's just because she's so much more alert now or she knows daddy is gone again or what.  She still is not sleeping well and does not nap for longer than 45 minutes, and she is seldom content to occupy herself for any amount of time anymore.  Finding time to shower is difficult, let alone pack up our entire apartment!  Please don't misinterpret me on this point though.  I will admit I have gotten frustrated on more than one occasion, but I don't for a single minute wish she wasn't here.  She brings more joy into my life than I ever imagined she could, and I had no idea I could love someone the way I love her.

I have been meaning to write an update for well over a week, but just haven't found the time.  There have been quite a few things I'd like to blog about, but I probably won't get to it until after the move.  There has been one topic that's been on my mind for a while, but of course now that I've found the time to actually put it into writing, I don't remember what it is.  I'm sure I'll be thinking of it as I try to sleep tonight, but it alludes me for the time being.  I also have a few posts to write about diapering, one about laundry routines and another about advice I wish I'd followed.  I'd like to write some reviews of different diapers if I ever find the time, too. 

And she's awake now, so I'm off again.  Enjoy this {rainy} Saturday!

Edit: Now I remember what I actually wanted to blog about, and I'm writing it down so that next time I have time to write I will remember my topic: Parenting Guilt